What narrative have you told yourself during your biggest moments of self-doubt? I have a self consciousness around intelligence, which I’ve written about before. My credibility has been “questioned” throughout my life, and I have some theories as to why that happens. (You’ll have to wait for the talk to be live to hear those theories.) I’m pretty comfortable with public speaking. I’ve given keynotes, countless client presentations, and appeared on-air at dozens of news studios for live interviews.
If you create a narrative around your own self doubt, you’ll find the proof to support it. But if you try, you can combat that self doubt with a counter argument. And you do that by turning to your community. How do you think I spent the first few weeks after getting laid off? I called everyone I knew - friends, former clients, colleagues I had worked with - telling them I was able to take on new consulting projects. They were all excited for me in this next chapter. One even congratulated me for getting laid off. They saw the possibilities before I did. That’s how I got my first really big contracts. That’s how my consulting business grew beyond a side hustle and into a business that allowed me to finally contribute to my family’s expenses once again. Better yet, I started to reframe my own internal narrative that I had any sort of lack of credibility or intelligence. I didn’t need to prove my value to anyone. If people in this corner saw my bubbly, talkative personality and made assumptions about my credibility, that said more about them than it ever did about me. There will always be people who support the narrative born of your self doubt. Because over here, you have an entire galaxy of people who see how bright you can shine. Who will help you create that counter narrative, to show you how capable you truly are. Sometimes it’s your community who can pull you out of those destructive and generally false narratives you tell yourself in those moments of self doubt. But you have to believe it, too. Trust the good things they say about you. That’s what will allow you to unlock the last phase of The Setback Cycle: Emerge. Take my advice. I certainly did. I stood up on that stage and even though my voice shook through the first few lines I delivered, I did the scary thing and made my way through it. When the crowd applauded, I thought back to my career setback that led me to write the book, which is what led me to stand in that moment. It felt very "Emerge." As I wait impatiently for that video to get posted to the TEDx website, here’s what I’m: My mother and all the moms/mother figures in my life. Every year I try to do a donation themed gift and I just love these bracelets from my friends at Social Goods that benefit Every Mother Counts. Palak Patel (yes, The Setback Cycle’s very own star of Chapter 8!) just published her cookbook, Food is Love. Her philosophy around food is that both cooking and eating are ways of connecting with our loved ones, expressing affection and celebrating life. The latest insane news on women’s ever decreasing reproductive autonomy. Turns out, women in Missouri can’t get divorced if they’re pregnant. Also, did anyone see this piece about toddlers who remember their past lives? I can’t stop thinking about it! Your big moves, the scary, bold ones propelling you into your next chapters. Like Courtney. She's a teacher, a mom of three, friend and Amy’s Antidote reader who decided to run for her local school board. She’s doing the scary thing because she cares so deeply about her community and I doubt you'd find anyone more qualified for a school board position than a mom who is also a teacher. |
Amy is a USA Today Bestselling Author of The Setback Cycle, sought after leadership and career coach, a TEDx Speaker, award-winning marketer and freelance journalist whose work has appeared in ForbesWomen, Harvard Business Review, Fast Company and more
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